First Steps

Tonight James took his first steps - and it was amazing. I wanted to shout for John to grab the camera but I didnt want to startle James into falling so John and I basically froze. It was like time stood still - and James did not even notice. He acted like it was a normal everyday occurrence. And when he fell down into a crawl he gave us that look like we were crazy for thinking something big just happened. And once we broke out into celebratory yells and jumping up and down, he started cheering too - but I know he didn't know why. Just like when someone coughs, he feels the need to cough too.

Now that James is in bed and I'm writing this post, its weird... I kinda feel lonely. John is sitting on the couch next to me watching the OSU game,  I have two dogs at my feet and several cats lounging around the room - I'm not alone. But my baby is growing up and a toddler is taking his place. A toddler that is independent and stubborn, who doesn't want to cuddle as much or snuggle before bed. I miss my baby, but I wouldnt trade this fun, amazing, smart toddler for anything.

I love this stage.

When he does something brand new and rebellious, I often have to fight not to laugh. Sometimes, I don’t really want him to go to bed because we’re having too much fun and I don’t want to ruin it. Other times, I really want him to go to bed so I can have some fun that doesn’t involve me scraping food off the walls (but while scraping food off the walls I giggle at the memory of him having so much fun eating dinner). Though I’ve read parentings books and articles, not one of them has given me the secret key to being a parent. Most days, I’m going on gut; flying by the seat of my pants. I’m pretending to know what I’m doing because somehow, unfathomably, I’m the one in charge.

Which leads me to wonder: all this time, were our parents faking it too?

I bet they were.

My mother laughing at me leads me to believe I’m right.

******** (this means totally random change of subject)********


Here are some pictures from James' friend Max's first birthday party.  It was a good party and always fun to hang out with close friends - and there was cake. Win win for everyone :)